This hoodie ships fast & free from Detroit. Breaking bulletin from Section 142: a shaggy legend just claimed sideline clearance and unfurled a banner that simply reads KINGDOM. The drumline approved; decibels filed paperwork. Folklore notes this primate patriot migrates toward red horizons whenever lions wander in. Documented only in three blurry sightings and one rib-stained selfie, the subject favors victory formations and barbecue proximity. Field-guide entry: specimen emits rally whoops between 96–142 dB, increases flag waving after snacks. Zip it up for stadium nights, couch command posts, chilly tailgates, or those Monday status meetings where you “accidentally” bring a cowbell. Recorded sightings often include nacho dust and triumphant struts. The hoodie itself behaves like equipment: plush interior calibrated for replay marathons; exterior tough enough to survive family tree tumbles and the disappointment of the prequels. Drawcords operate like sideline comms. Ribbed cuffs hold the line even when the fourth quarter doesn’t. Color saturation rated “arrowhead sunrise,” tested against spilled soda and bandwagon opinions. Plant your feet, lift the banner, and remind the pride they’re visiting. Peer-reviewed conclusion: wearing this increases third-down swagger by unmeasured percentages. Dare yourself not to buy it. If questioned, cite the Department of Myth: Section Kingdom, Subsection Roar. Credentials verified by barbecue sauce. 🚚 SHIPPING INFO:

• 🕒 This item ships FAST — because kickoff waits for no one.
• ✅ No extra shipping charge — it's built into the drop.

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