This hoodie ships fast & free from Detroit. Game tape doesn’t lie: Blitz Beast isn’t here to “play nice.” Standing 15’3” and weighing in at a casual 1257 pounds (pre-BBQ), this Kansas City cryptid has been spotted lumbering through Arrowhead parking lots with rib sauce in his beard and a foam finger the size of your car door. Documented sightings confirm: he doesn’t just attend games, he becomes the halftime show—especially when there’s brisket involved. Field researchers note his stats: 14 games played, plus three unlicensed tailgates, with only two flags drawn for “excessive swag” (a record low for a creature wearing sunglasses indoors). Subjects report that anyone who throws on this hoodie immediately gains +10 to endurance for cold bleachers and +20 intimidation points against rival fans. Warning: may cause involuntary chants of “CHIIIIEEEEEFS” at grocery stores. The hoodie itself? Softer than a rookie cornerback after facing Mahomes, but tougher than the hangover you’ll earn Monday morning. Heavyweight fabric built for late-season winds, nacho cheese spills, and one too many high-fives from strangers who “just love your vibe.” Wear it, and you’re not just a fan—you’re field research in progress. Buy it now, or be forever catalogued under “cryptids who didn’t commit.” 🚚 SHIPPING INFO:

• 🕒 This item ships FAST from Detroit — because kickoff waits for no one.
• ✅ No extra shipping charge — it's built into the drop.

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