Bigfoot Giants Hoodie — New York Football Sasquatch Gear
$ 42
This hoodie ships fast & free from Detroit. The Enforcer doesn’t walk into MetLife Stadium—he stomps through traffic like a one-creature wrecking crew, waving off honking cabs and scooping up stray pretzels like power-ups. Documented only in shaky fan footage and one cursed subway TikTok, this 15’3”, 1252-pound specimen has been credited with intimidating 142 subway rats, nine rival quarterbacks, and at least one hot dog vendor who got the mustard ratio wrong. Field notes confirm: the Enforcer thrives in all weather conditions—rain, sleet, snow, or the collective sigh of despair that blankets the city every Monday commute. Owners of this hoodie report sudden boosts to cold-weather resilience, an iron stomach for stadium nachos, and the uncanny ability to yell “DEE-FENSE” louder than the Jumbotron speakers. One subject even reported intercepting a football and a taxi in the same afternoon. (Results may vary, especially if you don’t hydrate.) The fabric? Cozy enough to nap on the PATH train, durable enough to withstand spilled beer, pigeon attacks, and the crushing existential weight of a rebuilding season. Scientists agree: it’s 50% hoodie, 50% armor, 100% New York attitude. Put it on and you’re not a fan—you’re a cryptid legend with season tickets. Wear it, or risk being mistaken for Philly. 🚚 SHIPPING INFO:
- 🕒 This item ships FAST from Detroit — because kickoff waits for no one.
- ✅ No extra shipping charge — it's built into the drop.
Field Notes: Squatch Hoodie (Premium Edition)
- Composition: 9.5-ounce, 50/50 ring-spun cotton/poly—engineered to outlast cold nights, weird sightings, and disappointing movie sequels.
- Fabric Treatment: Preshrunk, soft-washed, garment-dyed—basically pre-broken-in by the cryptid council so it feels legendary straight out of the bag.
- Origin Story: 80% sustainably and fairly grown USA cotton, stitched together with USA cotton thread—ethically squatchy, locally conjured.
- Fit & Build: Relaxed fit, sideseamed body, and 1x1 rib on collar/cuffs—cut loose, ribbed tough, and shaped for maximum myth retention.
Reviews
🗣 No reviews yet — but that’s where you come in.
Be the first to tell the world what it’s like to wear gear straight from Bigfoot’s personal locker.
📸 Send your review (and a photo if you’ve got one!) to
👉 campfire@mythicalthreads.com
And because legends take care of each other...
🎁 We’ll give you 10% off your next order if you send in a photo with your review.
Yes — that includes blurry tailgate selfies, mirror pics, and shots of your dog wearing your hoodie.
Let’s build the myth together. 🔥
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