Bigfoot Canoe Hoodie — Yep, I Canoe Too Standard Issue
$ 38
Field Notes: Aquatic Variant, Subject B-FOOT Yes, he hikes mountains. Yes, he shreds waves. But confirmed reports show Bigfoot also… paddles. Witnesses describe a hairy silhouette cruising silently across foggy lakes, flashing a peace sign like some oversized scout master, and mumbling, “Yep, I canoe too.” Documented only in one soggy ranger log and a misplaced Polaroid that smells like trout. For researchers (and snack smugglers) alike, the Squatch Canoe Hoodie is standard-issue field gear. Reinforced seams? Tougher than campfire coffee. Drawcord system? Classified “secure,” whether you’re cinching up for dawn paddle missions or raiding the cooler after dark. The fabric is an 80/10/10 tri-blend miracle—cotton comfort, polyester backbone, and recycled bottles reborn as cryptid apparel. Think: eco-warrior meets myth. Inside, the 3-end fleece is loftier than your fishing stories, with a tight-knit construction to keep the canoe print sharp enough to outlast both mosquitoes and Uncle Gary’s bad puns. Conclusion: this hoodie is functional camouflage for waterlogged legends and weekend wanderers. Wear it lakeside, fireside, or while pretending you didn’t just tip the canoe. End report: Bigfoot paddles. You should too.
Field Notes: Squatch Hoodie (Standard Issue)
- Seam Construction: Double-needle top stitch on all seams—reinforced like Bigfoot’s alibi, tougher than blurry evidence.
- Drawcord System: DTM round drawcord with tipped ends + metal eyelets—classified as “secure enough for forest trekking and late-night snack raids.”
- Fabric Origin: 80% cotton, 10% polyester, 10% recycled plastic bottles—yes, you’re basically wearing a hybrid of trees, tech, and trash-turned-treasure.
- Material Behavior: 3-end fleece with tight-knit construction—optimized for sharper prints and a loftier handfeel (translation: cozy enough to survive abductions, Netflix, or Ice Age flashbacks).
Reviews
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📸 Send your review (and a photo if you’ve got one!) to
👉 campfire@mythicalthreads.com
And because legends take care of each other...
🎁 We’ll give you 10% off your next order if you send in a photo with your review.
Yes — that includes blurry tailgate selfies, mirror pics, and shots of your dog wearing your hoodie.
Let’s build the myth together. 🔥
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